Twiddling thumbs

Ye gads and the seagulls of the Arctic, by yer mainbrayce, there is a real brew-ha coming up like a huge late summer scirrocco storm in the Bay of Biscay I can tell ye lads. No sooner than I slipped me moorings and headed out to sea near Port Royal, with a young Keira Knightley by me side, then we heard a huge sea-storm blow up in the Carribean and lots of lights were knocked out all round, especially on the 4 French curaissier ships caught in the channels between two islands of Virgin-Lesbos and Montserrat-Peeble - the SS Corblimeymate, her sister ship SS Kismet Hardy, and bringing up her rear as ever the dirty old tugboat of Napoleon, the SS Noah's Ark, trailed in the main by the old faggot and coal ship from Edinburgo, the SS Cutty Buddha, captained by Admiral Le Nez Je Touche, a right banana. A messy business and not a pretty sight as all these old corvettes were slim and lean in their youth - now they look like vietnamese pot bellied pigs and none can outrun a RN flagship - the RN is always on their tails, though not before Capt Jack Sparrow and his pirates and belles of the Ballustrade have today found them out - in flagrante delicto - on the south sea islander rampage among the unspoilt and innocent and untried virginals of the Virgin Islands. Terrible storms these late summer ones me hearties - terrible stuff - lots of thunderbolts and lightning flashes on the horizon.